Bob Newheart: Stop It

If you have ever in your life tried to give someone else advice on how to improve their situation and they didn't follow your advice to the "T", then you know the frustration that goes with being a counselor. Now, if you've actually ever counselled someone professionally, be it a consultant, a pastor or even a therapist, then you absolutely know this frustration.

After spending almost 2 years consulting with small business owners, 4 years before that as a pastor, and my whole life knowing exactly what everyone else should do to fix their problems (okay, that last one might be a bit of a stretch - I wasn't that good until I was 6 years old) I have not found any one thing to better illustrate the feelings and emotions that rage within me from time to time when I deal with complete idiots who couldn't fall off a house and hit the ground to save their lives.

Enjoy...



So, what ever it is that you're dealing with that causes you problems... STOP IT!

Witty, Cynical and Skeptical People

Last Friday afternoon, I had the opportunity to sit down with David Haupt, whom you may not be familiar with, but I'm fairly certain you know his work. David, founder of The Onion, came down to give some feedback with a start up company I'm working with. As David helped form the general concepts of how we should market to our clients (newspapers) it was fascinating to hear his anecdotal stories about what it was like in the beginning of the Onion and how that has changed. [David's blog is here]

Over the last 4 years, I've had the fortune of developing a couple relationships with journalists, editors and publishers. Yesterday, as I was at a local event and talking with the publisher and editor of a local paper, it dawned on me that one characteristic all newspaper staff have in common is a dry, witty and cynical sense of humor combined with a skeptical look at the world. The two yesterday, David last Friday, and even a good friend whom I recently reconnected with are all skeptical cynics. In fact, and I think my good friend I'm speaking of would take this as a compliment, he and David were strikingly similar in many ways. They even looked alike, which was a little eerie.

Don't get me wrong, I don't give that description with disdain, instead I say it with sentiment because I think I could easily fit the profile of every newspaper person I've ever met. I am definitely skeptical in many ways and obviously cynical. Some even agree I'm witty, though not everyone thinks those combine to be humorous.

There is No "I" in Team

Every one who has ever played any sport as a kid growing up has heard the saying that There is no "I" in Team. Which was probably followed by the old "TEAM - Together Everyone Accomplishes More" line.

Well, as corny as those sayings are, they are true. Tonight marked the last game of our soft ball league even though there are 5 more games to play. Despite my great rookie pitching season, it's kind of hard to field a team when only half of your teammates show up. One decided that it would be better to babysit tonight than to show up then we had to recruit 3 others out of the stands. As a result, we only fielded 8, instead of 10. Not that it would have made much difference. We got pounded 12 to 2 and were given mercy in the 5th inning.

So, while some team members would rather baby sit, I'd rather not. So I'm throwing in the towel and forfeiting the rest of the games.

Always looking for the bright side of things, I found this and realized my loser season could have been much worse.

It's a Little Known Fact That...

With Mother's Day this last weekend I thought this would be an interesting tid-bit of information to share.

According to the National Retail Federation, florists do most of their
business around Mother's Day.

The day of maternal appreciation usually brings them 30 percent of their annual sales. Florists also report the week before the holiday is their busiest. Consumers were expected to spend $2.3 billion on flowers for mom this year.

Those are the kind of stupid facts that stick in my head for years. I know that at some point in the not so distant future, while standing at some networking event, I'll look incredibly intelligent by saying, "It's a little known fact that Mother's Day is responsible for bringing in 30% of the annual sales for a florist shop."

If you think that I sound at all like Cliff Clavin from Cheers, my deepest thanks to you.

Only recently did I quote Cliff's Buffalo Theory to some friends. Though I don't drink so I can't prove it, I'm quite sure it's true. Cliff Clavin, you are my hero!

Indexed

On a short surfing excusrion I came across this site. Indexed is written or should I say drawn by Jessica Hagy. Every day, on a 3 x 5 index card, she draws what I think. I would describe it as The Far Side meets all the stupid graphs I had to do in my econonomics classes.

Perhaps you think I'm a little geeky or a bit of a nerd for finding these funny, but I argue it shows my superior intellect and anyone who argues the contrary has proved my point. How's that for logic?

Anyway, point being, I encourage you to check it out. It's relevant, funny and witty. Whatever you call it, it's definiately innovative. She has even expanded to her own line of t-shirts so if you find one you really like, you may be able to wear it.